Just Keep Swimming
Funny thing about being single. It feels to me like swimming in cold water. Mind you, not cold enough to kill you. Just cold enough to make you feel both a little miserable and a little exhilarated all at once.
I ended my last relationship about 4 months ago. She really was a wonderful little island on which to recover from a painful divorce, but in the end, she just wasn’t the stabilizing force I needed to walk with me through my life as an equal. She had a list of things she wanted me to change and the list only grew longer as time dragged on. Unfortunately for us, I quite enjoy myself the way I am and have no interest in changing.
So I decided to jump back into the cold waters of loneliness to swim around for a while and see what other islands are out there. Sometimes I love the swim, when it feels like I’m just lying on my back afloat and drifting along in the warm sun. These are the times when I experience new people and events that I would have never experienced had I stayed put on that last island. But sometimes I hate it, when I feel like I’m struggling as hard as I can just to keep my head above water. These are times such as when I realize that the people with whom I was so close while on that last island are now suddenly drifting far away. I know that I need to find new people who are swimming in the cold open waters like me, but I sometimes wish I could just continue to rewrite the best parts of the previous chapter of my life while moving on to write the new chapter. But then, don’t we all?
If you’re out there swimming around by yourself like me, I don’t what advice I can give you. We’re all just hoping to find another island on which to rest. Maybe we dream of someday finding the mainland: a place where we can stop worrying about having to jump into the cold waters yet again. Until then…
Just keep swimming.